Saturday, March 1, 2014

Domestic Distance

My husband is going away for a whole week :(  I saw this survey on Leah Q's blog, and I asked him to take it before he leaves.   So, I sat and asked him questions while he packed his suitcase--very productive!

  1. What do you wish I'd cook more?
    I’m happy with anything you cook.  I LOVE to cook, and every night is something new and delicious.
  2. How do you like to be greeted when you walk in the door?
    A hug at the door.  Every day!
  3. What do you wish I'd wear more often?
    Less  Naturally
  4. What do you like me to wear to bed?
    Nothing  Naturally
  5. Where do you wish we went more often for fun?
    Somewhere to play laser tag.  I suck at laser tag, but OK.
  6. What's your idea of the perfect date?
    Anywhere we haven’t been before with good food.   We're running out of good restaurants!
  7. What can I do/say to make you feel sexy?
    Be sexually spontaneous  Surprise sex!
  8. How do you feel about D/D so far?  I added this question myself.
    Every day is a challenge, and I look forward to every day.  I do too :)
In addition, if anyone has any tips on how to maintain a DD relationship long distance let me know, because it may be only a week now, but my husband will be gone for 6 weeks over the summer.  I have no idea how to maintain a DD dynamic with no physical contact--I think it will be very challenging.  I know there are others in this community that have done it, so I hope to hear from you!


  1. Looks like the survey is making the rounds. It is great you asked these questions before he left so you can consider his responses and work towards meeting those needs once he gets back. I am not sure how to help with the long distance issue with this lifestyle since it is not a problem for us. I do know there are certain things that can be said that might make a difference. You staying open and honest with any discussions held, accepting what he tells you. Perhaps journaling will help you keep things in perspective. He can decide if there are any needed consequences to behaviors that he finds not acceptable. I would find this challenging myself. I am sure there are those that can provide you with some good advice.

    1. I like the survey--short, sweet, and informative. Thanks for the tips! I used to journal all the time, but I haven't since I've been dating my now husband. I think it would really help for me to start again.

  2. These are great answers, Autumn. Laser tag? You should practice while he's away and surprise him. His last answer is so sweet.

    I don't have a lot to offer about the long-distance dd. I'm sure it's a challenge. You might try asking at or coming to the Sunday chat - there are a lot of people with a broad range of experience.

    1. I used to play laser tag with my cousins on our Labor Day weekend camp out, and I really had fun with it, but I was terrible, haha. It would be fun to go with my husband, for sure. Thanks for the tip about the website--I had heard of these forums before, but I didn't really know what they were.

  3. Very cute answers, especially where you would add "naturally", lol.

    {{{hugs}}} EsMay

    1. I thought my husband's answers were cute, too :)

  4. Long distance is just an added stress to any relationship. Having a DD dynamic and long distance only makes things logistically harder.
    My suggestion is to create and use a responsibility journal. Go over things with him that you need to accomplish while he is gone, including everything from daily chores to bigger responsibilities. While he is gone you can add notes about completions or incompletions.
    Upon his return he can review what you did or did not accomplish. Depending on how you did, discipline would be administered. The important thing is to know consequences ahead of time and have them listed next to items.

    1. That's a good idea; thanks for the advice.

  5. I love this little Meme. I always think I will do one but then I change my mind. I liked your responses to his answers!

    I don't have any advice for doing DD over distances. SM doesn't really travel for his job much although he did go away for 3 weeks once. That was a long 3 weeks because he couldn't even call me but one time that entire time! He was on a small island and the cost of calling was atrocious. Hopefully you guys will be able to talk a lot. I would probably ask him for a list of things he would like you to do (if you don't have one already) and work on those things to keep yourself busy while he is gone? Just a thought.